Hang Ry at Hung Ry

We ate lunch here and I was not amused. The location in question is Hung Ry, 55 Bond Street. The Chinese characters beneath it’s name card simply says ‘pulled noodles’ which does not translate phonetically or in any other way to ‘Hung Ry’. Taken in this light the name of the restaurant runs along the same lines as a puerile ‘cream of some young gai’ Asian joke. What is the name of this place really meant to convey? Sadly, I would say that, after one eats there, one would still be hungry.

Considerable effort (and likely expense) was spent on developing the identity of the restaurant. I heard about the restaurant through the fanfare of a large PR trumpet. I don’t recall precisely, but was it in Vogue that I read about the restaurant with stylish photographs? Anyway, the long and short of this noodle fiasco is that they are trying very hard. Too hard in my opinion, but meanwhile missing the main point; Hung Ry’s website claims they produce the finest organic hand pulled noodles, along with additional blurb about natural, locally grown farm fresh food. Additional mention of how the restaurant is furnished with hem stitched linens and organic soap, Limoges flatware, reclaimed wood décor and even organic paint! Will someone stop all this fluff and nonsense?  Surely what matters to me is how the noodles taste in my mouth.

The service was ingratiatingly polite. No matter that I could barely understand the waiter at all. Common sense and a degree of deduction will inform you of what the waiter is trying to convey to you. We were three that day, Russ and I were joined by our friend Rebecca. Russ ordered the ‘Duck Breast, leg, szechuan, goji berry, long beans, Chinese broccoli’. Rebecca went the vegetarian route with ‘Carrot broth, charred kazu, seasonal vegetables’ and I went with the ‘Bo-Bo chicken, orange cauliflower, Chinese broccoli, fermented tofu broth’.  

Rebecca is smiling.

I didn’t know what Bo-Bo chicken is and I couldn’t figure out a Chinese translation either. Nor could I be bothered to ask the waiter who spoke his own version of English. Shortly after placing our order, a petit amuse bouche of pork gelatin arrived. A little challenging and perhaps not to everyone’s liking. After all pork is not one of the many available flavors of Jello at the supermarket. Then we waited for our main courses…and waited…and waited…

The duck breast soup.

For a restaurant that is a quarter to a third full, the amount of time we had to wait was not good. So, as prophesized, we were hungry. Deliverance did finally come, but without much reward. Looking at Russ’s duck noodles, the broth was dark and flavorful, however it was loaded with so much salt that it could have sent a heart attack patient to the grave. The dark wheat noodles it came with were mushy and broke into little pieces. I would liken them to cardboard confetti. How a restaurant that specializes in noodles could serve noodles like that is beyond me.

The Bo-Bo Chicken soup. 

The Bo-Bo chicken was equally uninspiring, the chicken being dry and tough. Accompanying vegetables were fine, but neither here nor there. No amount of fancy sounding menu description could save this bowl of ennui. The only glimmer of light in this meal of despair turned out to be Rebecca’s noodles with summer vegetable broth. I had fully given up all hope and didn’t think I would have anything good to say at all, yet the same poor noodle quality aside, the broth was surprisingly good. It had a intriguing depth of flavor with a central note of ginger.

Well at least Rebecca is still smiling...

If you think I am being hard to please here, you are correct. The average price for a bowl of noodles here is $18. That price point is over three times what one would pay in a typical Chinatown noodle restaurant, where I might add you would have a far superior bowl of noodles. There is a pulled noodle restaurant that we frequent regularly. The place is a dive, but the noodles there are simply genius in a ‘they made this all their lives’ kind of way. A bowl of noodles there costs $5.

Ian.

Rating 1 star out of 5

Likelihood of return: Extremely low.